Dan: The Olympic Gold medal winning gymnast and high school sophomore said that 'after all those years of hard work, it was a relief to finally realize her life-long dream.' Good to get that out of the way at fifteen.
Casey: Folks, if you've been watching CSC's continuing coverage of Desmond Corey's assault on Mount Everest, you'll want to set your alarms tomorrow. Two a.m. eastern, or that about, is when Corey's team is expected to be sending back the first live-video footage. Dan and I will be here with plenty of hot coffee and we hope you'll be joining us for what we're sure is going to be a very exciting event. You're watching Sports Night on CSC, so stick around.
Dave: We're out.
Natalie: Two minutes back.
Jeremy: 29,000 feet. Know how tall that is?
Will: It's 29,000 feet.
Chris: It's actually 29,029 feet.
Dana: But it's those last 10 yards that'll kill ya.
Jeremy: It's huge. It's 8,848 meters.
Natalie: It sounds more impressive at 29,000 feet.
Jeremy: All right, I'm going to stick with 29,000 feet. How can I best express this? How many of what kind of thing would we have to line up end to end?
Elliot: 29,000 rulers.
Jeremy: I don't think you people are quite getting into the spirit of the hill.
Kim: The spirit of the hill?
Jeremy: The spirit of the hill!
Dana: How about this: if I shot you out of a missile silo, you'd have to go 29,000 feet in order to clear the peak of Everest, land on a pile of rocks in Tibet and shut the hell up.
Jeremy: I'm just saying it's a big mountain.
Dana: And I hear ya.
Dan & Casey's office
Casey: Cold outside?
Dan: Not fit for man nor beast out there, but here I am.
Casey: Any good mail?
Dan: Everybody needs money.
Casey: Well, who's everybody?
Dan: Everybody: medical research, hospitals, schools, animal shelters, day care centers, boy scouts, girl scouts, all kinds of scouts.
Casey: You got yourself on a mailing list.
Dan: I'm on a mailing list to end all mailing lists.
Casey: Who'd you give money to?
Dan: I honestly can't remember Casey. A couple of months ago, I wrote a check to someone and now I'm in the middle of Dickensian London. I'd love to give money to all these people, but then I'd have no money and I'd need somebody's mailing list just to pay rent.
Casey: It's a vicious circle.
Dan: It is.
Casey: It's a never-ending circle.
Dan: Just keeps going round and round.
Casey: Never ends.
Dan: Which is what makes it vicious.
Casey: And a circle.
Dan: What do I do?
Casey: About what?
Dan: You're not listening.
Casey: I was listening a little. I remember the circle.
Dan: I'm inactive. I don't act. I talk a pretty good game, but in the end I just sit there completely inactive.
Casey: Ah, like the trusty basset hound.
Casey: Except basset hound's don't talk a good game.
Casey: They don't talk at all, Danny.
Dan: Do you understand what I'm saying?
Casey: They're dogs.
Dan: I'm inactive.
Casey: Pick a letter. Write a check.
Dan: Which would certainly ease my liberal guilt.
Casey: It's a vicious circle.
Dan: Very vicious.
Casey: You know, while we've been having this conversation, a couple people have probably died from something you could have cured.
Dan: That's great Casey. Easing of the pressure.
Casey: Let's take a look. (Dan hands over the letters) The Montgomery Symphony Orchestra.
Dan: Montgomery, Alabama?
Casey: Who cares. (tosses letter aside)
Dan: What's wrong with music and why shouldn't Montgomery have some?
Casey: Well, there's nothing wrong with music, and Montgomery obviously does have some, but this is about prioritizing and I don't think the world is suffering from a lack of quality symphony orchestras, do you?
Dan: But music, culture, the arts--these are things that shouldn't be confined to just New York and Vienna.
Casey: It's settled then. The Montgomery Symphony Orchestra gets a charitable donation from Dan Rydell.
Dan: Not so fast. What's the next one?
Casey: The American Heart Association.
Dan: Oh. And I suppose they're trying to cure disease.
Casey: Tell ya what, why don't you have your new friends in Alabama play them some Beethoven?
Dan: I'm gonna need to think about this one.
Dana: We've got Kelly from New Orleans after the Saints finish up and then Brian in San Fransisco. Natalie, you've got something from building security?
Natalie: Yes, they say with the cold weather already here, some of our local homeless have begun spending the night in the atrium of the 6th avenue lobby. If we see anyone, we're supposed to call security at 1-1-6.
Dan: Wait a second, shouldn't we be doing something for them?
Casey: Like what?
Dan: What do they need?
Casey: The homeless?
Casey: They need homes.
Dana: Moving on.
Isaac: Do we know where the Corey team is?
Jeremy: They're going to strike camp in a little while, and head for the Hillary step up the southeast face.
Dana: Where are they right now?
Elliot: Camp four, about 2500 feet below the summit.
Jeremy: That's where the toe holds start getting pretty scarce.
Casey: Yeah, tell me about it.
Jeremy: Radio contact has been coming in and out, but as far as we know...
Dana: Excuse me? Did you just say 'tell me about it'?
Casey: Just now?
Dana: Jeremy said 'toe holds start getting pretty scarce' and you said 'tell me about it.'
Dana: Implying that?
Casey: I climb.
Isaac: You climb?
Casey: I climb. I'm a climber.
Dan: You climb at your gym.
Casey: Darn tootin' I do, and it's a challenging ascent.
Dan: It's a wall in a gym.
Casey: It simulates a Class III mountain.
Natalie: I hear the air gets pretty thing up near the juice bar.
Casey: You know, mock me if you must, but I hold in my heart what few men possess.
Dana: A one year membership to the Big Apple Health and Raquet club?
Casey: The spirit of the hill.
Jeremy: Yeah, tell 'em Casey.
Dana: Yes, tell us.
Casey: There's a spirit.... and hill...
Jeremy: Man, did you drop the ball!
Casey: Oh, like you've climbed Kilimanjaro.
Dana: All right. So you all know the drill for today?
Everyone: Yes. I do. We know.
Dana: Do you?
Everyone: Yes. We've got it. We know.
Dana: You don't, do you?
Dan: We do. We understand the drill.
Dana: We do our regular Sunday show...
Casey: And she's still gonna tell us.
Dana: We do our regular Sunday show. We stick around and wait for the live feed from Everest. We kick it to Mike and Libby in Nepal, and we anchor the special.
Casey: That was pretty complicated. Could you go over it one more time?
Dana: I'm not gonna be here this afternoon. I'm gonna be gone for, like, four hours.
Natalie: Everything's under control.
Dana: Good. I'll be back at 7. I'll need to see all the tape on the 1:00 games, and anything we've got on the 4s. Pitch me any features at the 8:00 rundown and somebody stay on top of Oakland and Baltimore.
Isaac: Where are you taking your niece?
Dana: The Lion King.
Isaac: She'll love it.
Dana: Yeah, whatever. I could really do without a Broadway musical today.
Isaac: I think it'll be good for you. You've been working too hard. It's good to get out and see life beyond these walls.
Dana: I got a video crew in the Himalayas, Isaac. How much further outside did you want me to go?
Isaac: I want you to look at something that's not on a television screen. How long ago did you get your tickets?
Dana: I haven't gotten them yet.
Isaac: You haven't gotten them yet?
Dana: I've got the box office number right here. I was just gonna call.
Isaac: Dana, the show's sold out. You can't just get tickets.
Dana: Don't be ridiculous, Isaac. It's a children's show.
Isaac: Call the box office.
Dana: Look, I...
Isaac: Call them.
Dana: (dials number) Hi. I'd like two of your best seats for this afternoon's matinee. Anything between the 8th and the 12th row, in the center, and if I end up with an obstructed view, you're going to have a very angry woman on your hands. Yes. Yes.
Isaac: What's he saying?
Dana: It's tough to say, he's laughing pretty hard. And now he's telling his friends. And there, he just hung up.
Dana: Totally screwed.
Isaac: (laughs and takes envelope out of pocket) Take them.
Dana: What's this?
Isaac: Two tickets to The Lion King.
Dana: How, how did you know that...?
Isaac: How did I know that you've been living in this city for 3 years and you still have no idea where to take your niece?
Isaac: Lucky guess.
Dana: These are wasted on me, Isaac. You should give them to a theater lover.
Isaac: You should become a theater lover.
Dana: I've tried. I've really tried. But the singing and the dancing, and there's oftentimes a hoedown.
Isaac: There's no hoedown.
Dana: Don't tell me there's no hoedown, mister, I've been there.
Isaac: Enjoy the show.
Dana: I'll enjoy it for my niece.
Isaac: Enjoy it for yourself.
Dana: I appreciate the tickets. I'll be back at 7. (exits)
Isaac: Nothing wrong with a good hoedown.
Elliot: Casey, Five Stars won't deliver.
Casey: What do you mean they won't deliver?
Elliot: They won't deliver.
Casey: They always deliver.
Elliot: Well, not today.
Casey: Why not?
Elliot: Water main broke on 6th avenue and they're not letting anyone through.
Casey: I'm starving.
Elliot: I know.
Casey: Did you tell them that I'm starving?
Elliot: They really seemed to care.
Casey: Five Stars won't deliver.
Dan: Water main busted out front.
Casey: I know.
Dan: I'm starving.
Natalie: Anybody with cut footage from the 1:00s, I need them on my desk in 15 minutes!
Dan: Natalie, let me ask you something?
Dan: What do you do with your money?
Natalie: What do I do with my money?
Natalie: Well, my portfolio's pretty much tied up in food and shelter, Dan.
Dan: I meant your disposable income. I've got some extra money and I don't know what to do with it.
Natalie: Wow. That must really suck.
Dan: Yeah, it's a tough decision, 'cause when you're trying.... all right I see what you're saying. All right. Thanks anyway.
Natalie: Every once in awhile, if I have a few extra dollars, I'll give it to an AIDS group.
Dan: That's great.
Natalie: It's only a little bit.
Dan: A little is better than nothing.
Natalie: I'll get you the name and address.
Dan: The thing is more people die of breast cancer every year than die of AIDS. More people die of diabetes. About 20 times as many die of heart disease, but the government doesn't spend as much money researching those. It's not that we shouldn't be trying to cure AIDS. It's just that we should be trying to cure everything. And if I'm dying of luekemia, I might well wonder where my red ribbon is. Why isn't someone throwing me a pajama party at Barber's?
Jeremy: Hey, I just got off the phone with Libby in Nepal. Corey's 1500 feet from the summit.
Natalie: Two guys have ascended five miles into the sky. They walked up a wall of ice and are prepared to knock on the door of heaven itself. There's really no end to what we can do. Know what the trick is?
Natalie: Get in the game.
Jeremy: 700 have made the summit.
Casey: And how many have died trying?
Jeremy: One in four. Last year, 15 died and that's the most since Hillary made it in '53.
Casey: One in four die?
Casey: Let's get that stat up front.
Casey: What do they die from, hypothermia mostly?
Jeremy: Hypothermia, sometimes a fractured skull.
Casey: From what?
Jeremy: From falling very far and landing on a rock.
Jeremy: Some of them die from something called 'cerebral edema.' It's a high altitude sickness that leaves its victims so disoriented, they literally can't save themselves. They sit there knowing that if they don't move, they're going to freeze to death, but they don't do anything about it because their brain isn't giving them enough oxygen to care.
Casey: Huh. You think you'd ever try it?
Jeremy: Who, me?
Jeremy: I'd have to get into shape.
Casey: What if you got into shape?
Jeremy: I'd have to join your gym.
Casey: Got a Class III mountain.
Jeremy: Would I climb Everest?
Jeremy: Maybe. If I could do it right now, before I really have anything to live for.
Casey: You don't think you have anything to live for?
Jeremy: Sure, but not like you. You've got a son and great career.
Casey: You've got stuff to live for.
Jeremy: Not as much as I'm hoping I'll have to live for. Later. After I've lived a little while longer.
Casey: I see.
Natalie: (enters) Guys, this is the film that I was telling you about. It'll give you a good rundown of the equipment for the final assault.
Casey: Thanks. Hey, stay here, I just want to get that other stuff from my office. (exits)
Jeremy: How're you doing?
Natalie: Pretty good.
Jeremy: Casey and I were just talking about cerebral edema.
Natalie: This is ridiculous.
Jeremy: It's insane.
Natalie: We can't act like this with each other.
Jeremy: I like you. You like me. Everybody knows. Let's just go out and be done with it.
Natalie: That's right.
Jeremy: So what if it's unprofessional.
Natalie: You think it's unprofessional?
Jeremy: I didn't say that.
Natalie: You did say that.
Jeremy: But I didn't mean it.
Natalie: Look, we have to have an understanding. At work, we just work. Professional. No furtive glances, no smiling at each other, or flirting by the coffee. Right?
Jeremy: Absolutely. (Natalie kisses him) I think that's the trick. We just concentrate on the show and leave the rest for after.
Natalie: I agree.
Jeremy: Good. (Natalie kisses him again) I think we're gonna need a new plan.
Jeremy: I tell you this: any small glimmer of a chance that I was going to climb Everest as completely vanished. (Jeremy kisses her)
Dan: Isaac, you got a second?
Isaac: Sure. What's on your mind?
Dan: You make a lot of charitable donations, don't you?
Isaac: I try.
Dan: Who do you give your money to?
Isaac: I used to give money to the Democratic Party.
Dan: Not anymore?
Isaac: Well, you get your heart broken enough times, you learn your lesson.
Dan: Who do you give your money to now?
Isaac: I give it here and there. There are plenty of good causes.
Dan: That's the problem.
Isaac: Hmm. Danny, every morning I leave and acre and a half of the most beautiful property in New Canaan. Get on a train and come to work in a 54 story glass hi-rise. In between, I step over bodies to get here. 20, 30, 50 of them a day. So as I'm stepping over them, I reach into my pocket and give them whatever I've got.
Dan: You're not afraid they're going to spend it on booze?
Isaac: I'm hoping their going to spend it on booze. Look, Danny, for these people, most of them, it's not like they're one hot meal from turning it around. For most of them, the clock's pretty much run out. You'll be home soon enough. What's wrong with giving them a little novocaine to get them through the night?
Dana: Oh! My! God! (enters) Have you two lived?
Dan: Dana, what's...
Dana: I don't think you've lived! I don't think you've lived until you have seen this show!
Isaac: You liked it?
Dana: Liked it? I don't know where to start!
Isaac: That's wonderful.
Dana: I honestly, I don't know where to start!
Isaac: Why don't you organize your thoughts and get back to us.
Dana: The lights when out, and this woman with a voice like thunder. This woman, she summons all the animals of the jungle to appear at the birth of the new lion king. She summons them with her voice, and do you know... do you know what happens next?
Dan: The animals appear?
Dana: The animals appear! I got goose bumps. It was exactly where I was meant to be at that moment. I gotta go tell everybody! Can I go tell everybody?
Isaac: Go tell everybody.
Dana: (starts to leave but turns back) Thank you, Isaac.
Isaac: You're welcome.
Dana: (turns back again) Thank you for the tickets.
Isaac: You're welcome.
Dana: (turns once more) Thank you for everything. Thank you for opening my eyes to possibilities that would have gone heretofore unexplored, in a life that while ultimately...
Isaac: Go, go! (Dana runs out)
Kim: Nobody's delivering.
Casey: Nobody's delivering?
Kim: Nobody's delivering.
Casey: But we're in New York City!
Kim: Yes, I know. I recognize the big buildings.
Casey: What about the kitchen?
Kim: They took all the food out of the kitchen to spray for bugs.
Casey: Shouldn't there be some dead bugs lying around that I could eat?
Dana: Casey, listen to what happened to me!
Casey: I'm looking for dead bugs.
Dana: I went to a show.
Casey: Please tell me you have Milk Duds in your purse.
Dana: Don't you want to hear what happened to me?
Casey: Not unless you held up a deli during intermission.
Dana: I believe in the power of the theater.
Casey: Well, that's good. I believe in the power of a roast beef sandwich, so I really don't have time to talk. (starts to leave)
Dana: Casey. (Casey comes back) It was really quite something. The music began, and I just started to cry. I don't know where that came from. It was like church. I didn't know we could do that. Did you know we could do that?
Casey: Well, when I forget, something usually reminds me.
Dana: I didn't know we could do that.
Casey: And the cold front which seem to have blanketed the eastern seaboard, doesn't seem to have had an averse affect on the Lions offense this afternoon. Said Barry Sanders on his 240-yard 3 touchdown performance, "Heck. On a lot of those runs I was just trying to stay warm."
Dan: That's all for this edition of Sports Night, but don't go too far. Casey and I will be back at 2 a.m. to throw it to our team in Nepal for our full coverage of the Everest summit.
Casey: By the way, none of us have eaten, so if you happen to be walking by the building with a pizza...
Dan: You've been watching Sports Night on CSC. We'll see you later.
Casey: Good night.
Dave: We're out.
Natalie: All right, let's get to it.
Jeremy: I'll be in editing with Casey.
Natalie: That's the professional thing to do.
Jeremy: And that's what we are.
Natalie: You bet your sexy little butt we are.
Dana: I tell you what else. That wasn't my last Broadway musical, either. I'm hooked. Absolutely hooked. Chris, Will, Dave. You guys like the theater?
Chris: Love it.
Dave: Me too.
Will: It's not my cup of tea.
Dana: That's what I used to say. The trick is: you find the ones without the hoedowns.
Jeremy: Before they'll climb the mountain, the Sherpas perform a prayer ceremony, or puja, in which they ask the gods for permission to climb so close.
Casey: Maybe we shouldn't be trying to climb so close, Jeremy.
Jeremy: What do you mean?
Casey: Well, one in four people have died trying to get up there.
Jeremy: Yeah, but more people try to get up there each year than the year before.
Casey: Ancient mariners used to think that if they sailed to the end of the ocean, they'd fall into a fiery pit of dragons. Aviators thought that if they broke the sound barrier, their planes would fall apart. One of these days, we might be right.
Jeremy: Well, not today.
Casey: You think they're gonna make it?
Jeremy: If they don't, somebody else will.
Casey: What if the gods don't give permission to climb so close?
Jeremy: Then the gods can stick it. We're citizens of this planet--George Mallory, Edmund Hillary, Magellan, Balboa, Desmond Corey, you and I-- and I don't think anyone should tell us how high we can climb. (points to video footage of Everest) That's Mount Everest, the highest peak on the planet. You see a lock on the door and a Do Not Disturb sign?
Casey: It's five miles of ice straight up.
Jeremy: Piece of cake.
Casey: What's gotten into you?
Jeremy: I think I'm in love with Natalie.
Casey: Ah, that'll do it.
Jeremy: Now, let's get back to work.
Man in video footage, speaking into radio: Yeah. Yeah, right there. We can see it now.
Dan: That was the voice of Desmond Corey. You heard him say 'We can see it now.' I'm assuming he's referring to the summit. Casey.
Casey: Yeah, Dan. It's helpful to know that the summit of Everest is probably smaller than you've imagined. Really no bigger than the top of a dining room table.
Dan: (speaking to the team in Nepal) What can you tell us about those flags that are behind you?
Libby: Those are prayer flags, Dan, left by different climbers and sherpas. The different flags signify the different deities.
Casey: Mike, I understand that before they attempt Everest, the sherpas perform a prayer ceremony in which they ask permission to tread so close to the gods?
Mike: Casey, that's a ceremony called a puja, and I assure you the climbers take it very seriously.
Casey: What happens if permission is denied? What if the gods deem us not worthy to climb near them? (Mike and Libby do not respond but seem to be listening to something) Mike?
Dan: Libby, Mike, can you hear us?
Mike: Yeah, Dan. It looks like there's going to be another hold.
Dana: Damn it.
Dan: Libby, they got a problem up there?
Libby: It's hard to say, Dan.
Mike: Chances are they're changing their oxygen tanks and discarding the used ones.
Libby: They'll also want to do a final equipment inventory and a situational assessment before the last 15 feet or so.
Dana: How much more time?
Casey: How long of a wait do you suppose we're in for?
Mike: Probably not more than 10 minutes or so. The window only stays open for so long, so it's pretty much now or never.
Dana: We'll come back.
Dan: We want them to get this right, so while Desmond and his team get ready for the summit, we're going to return you to regular programming. Stay tuned to CSC. We'll have the summit in no time.
Casey: Don't go far.
Dave: We're out.
Casey: Dana, are they gonna be okay?
Dan: You sure?
Dana: Yeah. They're gonna be fine.
Casey: Then could we possibly get a large glazed ham in here?
Dan: A pot of beef stew?
Dana: We're trying.
Dan: How long does it take to fix a water main?
Dana: Why don't you go out there and ask them?
Dan: I would but it's not fit for man nor beast out there. (walks to the front of the desk)
Casey: Hey, did you solve your problem yet?
Dan: On how to be a guilt-free altruist?
Dan: It's easier being a miser.
Casey: Can I say something?
Casey: You're not going to solve everybody's problems. In fact, you're not going to solve anybody's problems, so you know what you should do?
Casey: Anything. As much of it and as often as you can.
Dan: (claps his hands together)
Casey: What, I'm right?
Dan: Which is suprising enough, but no. I just remembered there's a half a turkey sandwich in our office!
Casey: Get it! (Dan runs off)
Dan & Casey's office:
Dan comes running in singing 'Half a turkey sandwich' over and over, as he picks up the sandwich. When he turns to leave, he sees a man in his office and stops immediately.
Dan: Whoa. How did you get up here? (The man simply stares at Dan, not answering any questions) You're not supposed to be up here. Did they chase you out from downstairs? (The man nods slightly) All right, listen to me. You can't stay here. There are people working here. You can't stay here.
Elliot: Danny, Casey says... (he sees the man) Do you want me to call security?
Dan: (thinks.) No. Elliot, it's okay.
Elliot: Are you sure?
Dan: It's all right.
Elliot: I'll wait outside.
Dan: Thanks. I got a half a turkey sandwich. I tell you what.(Dan puts the sandwich on the table and pulls out a chair for the man, who watches without moving) I'm gonna sit with you, what you eat, and uh... I got to keep an eye on this monitor. I don't know if you can see but two guys are about to reach the peak of Mount Everest. Once they do I got about two minutes to get back on the air. (pauses) You got a name? All right, anyway... here's your sandwich. (Man starts to walk towards Dan, putting a hand in his pocket)No, no no, you don't have to pay me. (Man flips open a switchblade. Danny stands up quickly) Whoa, hey take it easy. (Man uses the knife to cut the sandwich in half, and offers half of it to Dan. "The Weight" by The Band starts to play) Thanks.
Man: You're welcome.
Dan: Why don't we sit and watch this now?
Elliot: It's happening.
Dan: We're watching.
Corey: (on monitor)Six. Five feet. Five feet away now.
Dan: Look at what we can do.
Corey: Four feet. This is it!